seeking.

more and more, it seems to me that God’s will is not discovered in making large decisions but in steadfast, consistent, faithful daily living–a long obedience in the same direction, some have put it.  and right now, i have so many questions about life…and it seems like there are no answers.

except there are lots of answers. the advice of friends and family, the whispered messages of the media, even the well-meaning instincts of those who really care about you. and more than that–there are our own ideas. the things we really desire–and when we get the chance to get what it seems we “really want,” that thing that will “really make us happy and whole,” sometimes we reach out to grasp it and realize that this wonderful thing is in fact…not such a wonderful thing.

which is why i really think that our decisions and God’s sovereignty come to meet in the big decisions but are much more significant in daily life–that day in and day out i seek His will. i don’t rush to my own conclusions. i don’t put all my eggs into the basket i’ve created. i don’t dream so much about my own visions for my life that i forget to seek His. these are all things i’m learning over the past few days…to rest, and wait, and be patient in His word.

after all, as st. bernard of clairvoux said, “we may without doubt hope for two things: either He will grant to us what we ask…or whatever is better.”

Lord, help me to believe this, and to hold fast to Your truth.

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